Monday, June 30, 2014
Like A Boss: Mirror Of Fate HD Boss Rush Rage Fail
Thank you david cox for heeding our pleas for a condescending, evil, masochistic boss rush mode that mocks you for failing over and over and over again.
thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Why there are no goblins in LoS2
It's a little known fact that lords of shadow's "goblin trials" are best approached in areas where goblins infinitely respawn due to being necessary for certain barriers.
so naturally I got the impression that my kill count of 734 goblins in the course of 30 minutes might be implying that gabriel belmont single handedly caused the extinction of goblinkind long before he became dracula.
Sunday, June 29, 2014
Thursday, June 26, 2014
Just another vergil vid
As the title implies, this is just something I cranked out in a coffeeshop while looking for work.
I'm a gamer first and a hard worker second, that said, I do have a nice thing going on fiverr, but it can in no way pay the bills.
this is me killing the boredom while feeling kinda useless.
Tuesday, June 24, 2014
About L the magnificent
a character i'd created a long time ago in a fit of inspiration, L the magnificent is a character who represents my own journey through the strange world i was born in, in a sense, his struggles are parodies of my own, whereas my situation boiled down to an identity crisis and a crisis of conscience, lucky's own versions of these problems could potentially threaten his life.
purely intended as a comic relief character for a far more serious book i was writing called "fearless, the werewolf knight" I soon fell in love with the established nature of the character, a man who unwittingly gets into ludicrous situations, yet luck and skill always seem to save the man at the last moment.
since then I sought to redefine lucky the magnificent from being "just a wiseass city guard" to being his own unique and fundamental character with a very lengthy and ridiculous backstory.
what drives the character is his desire to find a chaos crystal, in the first book he needed it to quarantine his original name, due in part to the fact that it had become a frightfully powerful spell that could take life away.
the first part of his story dealt primarily with him uncovering his old identity and trying to discern the truth behind his past and reconciling that with the false identity he'd been gifted with to help him survive.
the plot ends when lucky's father, the villain in the first book, dies due to his own misfortunes finally catching up to him, the second plot ultimately wound up being told, but was neither published or restored, and was little more than a side story within the larger tale.
My plan now is to write out the story of lucky the magnificent, starting with his hibernative state shortly after his name was stolen.
purely intended as a comic relief character for a far more serious book i was writing called "fearless, the werewolf knight" I soon fell in love with the established nature of the character, a man who unwittingly gets into ludicrous situations, yet luck and skill always seem to save the man at the last moment.
since then I sought to redefine lucky the magnificent from being "just a wiseass city guard" to being his own unique and fundamental character with a very lengthy and ridiculous backstory.
what drives the character is his desire to find a chaos crystal, in the first book he needed it to quarantine his original name, due in part to the fact that it had become a frightfully powerful spell that could take life away.
the first part of his story dealt primarily with him uncovering his old identity and trying to discern the truth behind his past and reconciling that with the false identity he'd been gifted with to help him survive.
the plot ends when lucky's father, the villain in the first book, dies due to his own misfortunes finally catching up to him, the second plot ultimately wound up being told, but was neither published or restored, and was little more than a side story within the larger tale.
My plan now is to write out the story of lucky the magnificent, starting with his hibernative state shortly after his name was stolen.
L The Magnificent
With a tip of his feather lined musketeer hat, his garish apparel sparkling in the summer evening light, he gripped his sword as tightly as he dared, turning his back on the slowly frothing ogre as it slowly advanced on him, club raised.
"don't do it." Lucky warned, but the ogre was hearing none of it, and came in charging with a dull growl that reminded lucky of the many times he'd played through this exact sort of situation, where he tested his good fortune to see just how far it could go.
Lucky the magnificent as he'd been named by the strange being who had gifted him with it, and it showed in his every step.
Lucky the magnificent, or as many would say, the human spirit of good fortune itself, a man whose entire life had been defined by good luck, regardless of what that ultimately meant at this moment in time.
the club came down, and just as he thought, something intervened, as it always had.
the ogre smiled, thinking it had at least clipped him, for the club missed badly, worse than if he had been in a fog and blatantly impossible to strike.
of course the next horizontal swing surely wouldn't miss, but lucky wasn't really concerned with the presence of the foul creature, for he was now walking through its cavern, virtually unchallenged even as the creature persistently tried to hit him, only to miss, again, and again and again.
"what is this?!" it howled in confusion.
"shades if i know." lucky admitted, continuing on as though nothing was the matter.
drooling in an irritated stupor the dense beast continued its assault, somehow continuing to miss, and as its strikes grew more furious, it began striking the cavern.
lucky smiled when he heard the roof of that cavern collapse atop the fool creature, for it had done so just as he found the beast's horde.
a small stack of gems atop a large stack of skeletons, discarded by the now deceased ogre for not being edible.
picking up one of the gems, he shook his head in disgust.
"Not this one." he mumbled, continuing his frantic search.
lucky had not been named "lucky" by chance, ironically, but as a safety measure, in this world, names were powerful, and defined the soul.
Lucky was originally an unfortunate person who'd had his name stolen by a villain, and though he'd disposed of the fool after a time, his name could not be recovered, without a name his prior identity was doomed to death.
worse still, had he not been named in the first place upon being found, his life would have eventually come to an end, for those without names have no definitions, and those without a definition fade away after a time.
in a way, lucky's existence was tentative, for his name was a mis-definition in and of itself, a human could not be an aspect of fortune for very long.
it took an incredible amount of magic to actually remove a name, it took even more to give one.
a name has to have meaning, and must be imbued with love and care by the parents who sired the named one, conversely, through magical means, it is the parent alone who holds the authority to steal a name back.
lucky's true name was likely within one of these crystals, and he intended to find the thing once and for all.
"don't do it." Lucky warned, but the ogre was hearing none of it, and came in charging with a dull growl that reminded lucky of the many times he'd played through this exact sort of situation, where he tested his good fortune to see just how far it could go.
Lucky the magnificent as he'd been named by the strange being who had gifted him with it, and it showed in his every step.
Lucky the magnificent, or as many would say, the human spirit of good fortune itself, a man whose entire life had been defined by good luck, regardless of what that ultimately meant at this moment in time.
the club came down, and just as he thought, something intervened, as it always had.
the ogre smiled, thinking it had at least clipped him, for the club missed badly, worse than if he had been in a fog and blatantly impossible to strike.
of course the next horizontal swing surely wouldn't miss, but lucky wasn't really concerned with the presence of the foul creature, for he was now walking through its cavern, virtually unchallenged even as the creature persistently tried to hit him, only to miss, again, and again and again.
"what is this?!" it howled in confusion.
"shades if i know." lucky admitted, continuing on as though nothing was the matter.
drooling in an irritated stupor the dense beast continued its assault, somehow continuing to miss, and as its strikes grew more furious, it began striking the cavern.
lucky smiled when he heard the roof of that cavern collapse atop the fool creature, for it had done so just as he found the beast's horde.
a small stack of gems atop a large stack of skeletons, discarded by the now deceased ogre for not being edible.
picking up one of the gems, he shook his head in disgust.
"Not this one." he mumbled, continuing his frantic search.
lucky had not been named "lucky" by chance, ironically, but as a safety measure, in this world, names were powerful, and defined the soul.
Lucky was originally an unfortunate person who'd had his name stolen by a villain, and though he'd disposed of the fool after a time, his name could not be recovered, without a name his prior identity was doomed to death.
worse still, had he not been named in the first place upon being found, his life would have eventually come to an end, for those without names have no definitions, and those without a definition fade away after a time.
in a way, lucky's existence was tentative, for his name was a mis-definition in and of itself, a human could not be an aspect of fortune for very long.
it took an incredible amount of magic to actually remove a name, it took even more to give one.
a name has to have meaning, and must be imbued with love and care by the parents who sired the named one, conversely, through magical means, it is the parent alone who holds the authority to steal a name back.
lucky's true name was likely within one of these crystals, and he intended to find the thing once and for all.
Depression
I'm tired, i don't just say that for the effect, i'm tired most every day.
I simply lack energy, i'm always unhappy, and it drains me on a physical level, to the degree that it can honestly prevent me from doing the most basic of tasks.
my depression, albeit a temporary source, stems from the constant self berating i put myself through for being raised in such a way that I simply do not understand society, to the degree that i infringe upon the happiness of others by simply being awkward.
it's not a matter of common sense for me, it's a struggle just to go out and speak to people, it's a struggle to move, to walk.
ninety percent of my day i'm sitting around people i barely care about, looking for people who are worth my time.
what depresses me isn't the fact that i feel worthless, what depresses me is the fact that i feel alone.
I wasn't raised with the expectation that i'd be living past my fifteenth year, as such my existence from the very beginning was treated like that of a dog you'd eventually have to put down.
why? well, namely i only existed for the sake of child support, that was my purpose, a source of funding.
when i finally gained some modicum of independent thought, i became a liability and was thrown out into a world that had long lived within a state that turned human beings into resources to better serve their society. i don't merely say this for effect, it's simply the way most societies are.
this is a society where money is survival and where your existence is defined by how well you manipulate the economic system for your own benefit, people simply don't seek meaning for any purposes other than attention, and as a result men like me, who grew up seeking purpose, philosophical foundation and many other things, things of meaning, can't get along with a world like this.
I feel alien to my own society, and that feeling persisted when i went to college, where the entire "your existence boils down to the figures you make with your job" theme was so prevalent that it poisoned various aspects of my community college.
yet to seek meaning is to become worthless, and this depresses me, should i settle for my own survival, or continue pursuing my own goals of meaning, even at the expense of my own society's comfort?
I prefer the latter, but even so, I reserve the right to be depressed about knowing that no matter what i do in this world, i'll most likely do so alone, without any hope of any kind.
People have simply given up on defining themselves and now pursue survival and only survival, even college students are subjected to this madness, where what they learn is based heavily on what best serves society.
and this, of course, depresses me.
I simply lack energy, i'm always unhappy, and it drains me on a physical level, to the degree that it can honestly prevent me from doing the most basic of tasks.
my depression, albeit a temporary source, stems from the constant self berating i put myself through for being raised in such a way that I simply do not understand society, to the degree that i infringe upon the happiness of others by simply being awkward.
it's not a matter of common sense for me, it's a struggle just to go out and speak to people, it's a struggle to move, to walk.
ninety percent of my day i'm sitting around people i barely care about, looking for people who are worth my time.
what depresses me isn't the fact that i feel worthless, what depresses me is the fact that i feel alone.
I wasn't raised with the expectation that i'd be living past my fifteenth year, as such my existence from the very beginning was treated like that of a dog you'd eventually have to put down.
why? well, namely i only existed for the sake of child support, that was my purpose, a source of funding.
when i finally gained some modicum of independent thought, i became a liability and was thrown out into a world that had long lived within a state that turned human beings into resources to better serve their society. i don't merely say this for effect, it's simply the way most societies are.
this is a society where money is survival and where your existence is defined by how well you manipulate the economic system for your own benefit, people simply don't seek meaning for any purposes other than attention, and as a result men like me, who grew up seeking purpose, philosophical foundation and many other things, things of meaning, can't get along with a world like this.
I feel alien to my own society, and that feeling persisted when i went to college, where the entire "your existence boils down to the figures you make with your job" theme was so prevalent that it poisoned various aspects of my community college.
yet to seek meaning is to become worthless, and this depresses me, should i settle for my own survival, or continue pursuing my own goals of meaning, even at the expense of my own society's comfort?
I prefer the latter, but even so, I reserve the right to be depressed about knowing that no matter what i do in this world, i'll most likely do so alone, without any hope of any kind.
People have simply given up on defining themselves and now pursue survival and only survival, even college students are subjected to this madness, where what they learn is based heavily on what best serves society.
and this, of course, depresses me.
Tuesday, June 17, 2014
Amazing Games that are more fun to play than you realize: Vergil's downfall.
Vergil's downfall is a blast, let me tell you that right now.
and what better way to tell you, than to show you?
Behold, exhibit awesome!!
if you haven't figured it out yet, vergil's downfall is actually a crazy chunk of dlc with a ton of hidden potential.
it's insane a lot of the time, and you can do a ton of amazing things with it once you figure out how to properly use the canceling system.
The greatest crime the DmC reboot ever committed was the crime of being TOO subtle with its plot and arrogant with its advertisement system, but the series has always been a decent game to play.
Imagine, a devil may cry where you could just freely execute insane combos while only having to worry very little about the potential threats that various enemies posed.
this is that game, a light wish in the face of extreme expectations, a devil may cry that allows you to just go nuts with the gameplay and do insane, over the top, stylish badass stuff that quite frankly is the heart of any spectacle fighter.
it may lack the "true" soul of devil may cry, but its heart is in the right place.
and what better way to tell you, than to show you?
Behold, exhibit awesome!!
if you haven't figured it out yet, vergil's downfall is actually a crazy chunk of dlc with a ton of hidden potential.
it's insane a lot of the time, and you can do a ton of amazing things with it once you figure out how to properly use the canceling system.
The greatest crime the DmC reboot ever committed was the crime of being TOO subtle with its plot and arrogant with its advertisement system, but the series has always been a decent game to play.
Imagine, a devil may cry where you could just freely execute insane combos while only having to worry very little about the potential threats that various enemies posed.
this is that game, a light wish in the face of extreme expectations, a devil may cry that allows you to just go nuts with the gameplay and do insane, over the top, stylish badass stuff that quite frankly is the heart of any spectacle fighter.
it may lack the "true" soul of devil may cry, but its heart is in the right place.
A temporary setback at most, an existential inconvenience at least.
Lords, where do I even begin?
Perhaps at the beginning? that is usually where most strange stories start, and so perhaps I shall begin here?
When I first came to this place, three years ago, I didn't know what I was doing, or that I was even doing anything at all.
it was an adventure! what hope does a man have when he's lost meaning and reason after all! who cares for the woes of the world when you've found those woes in full?
Now? I'm still certain that I can bear any pain that befalls me. however, when I came to portland, I created a goal.
I wanted to see what college was all about, and so, without a second's hesitation, I signed on for time at the portland community college, never made aware of the rules, expectations or anything.
I took out student loans, and all the while I sought a job, only to discover that work was not abundant by any means.
so to counter this problem, I began doing work on fiverr while taking out student loans, but the loans became my primary source of funding for the next three or so years.
so, when i finally got an apartment, I was...enthusiastic.
But, the instant i found security, the real problems began.
I became depressed, my roommates and I simply couldn't get along.
I was eccentric, I didn't care for the concerns of their life. these were people who used drugs like weed casually, I didn't fault them, but neither did I join them.
I focused on school, unaware of the fact that I could burn myself out, then getting depressed whenever it happened, for what else could I do? I didn't realize I was losing interest because my mind was becoming fatigued, at the time I wasn't even aware it could be fatigued!
through it all though, my determination stuck, but in order to keep student loans, I wound up having to sacrifice certain classes due to them being dropped.
and so I'd take a class such as art, which I did enjoy, i didn't necessarily have any direction in mind, and i was told that would come later.
when I finally did decide on a degree, it was a BA in japanese, however that required a transfer.
well, I finally transferred recently, and unfortunately I ran into a problem.
I wasn't receiving summer financial aid due to getting summer aid at my previous institute a full year earlier.
Now the matter has gotten out of hand, summer classes are upon me and i've decided to bow out for the summer term, but a hold has been placed on my account by my apartment, which is mainly due to my inability to pay rent.
I'll be speaking to the landlord and trying to make payment arrangements, but i'll be out of the apartment soon and will have to weather out homelessness for the next three months while paying what I owe this place, and I'm okay with that.
The problem is the hold they have on my account right now, it's in the way, and I intend to continue being in college for another three or four years before i'm done.
I can't immediately pay the rent, and I'll have no choice but to pack up and leave tomorrow, likely to be forced to wander the streets looking for a shelter that isn't empty.
This is of course, nobody's fault, it's not mine, it isn't the school's, it isn't my landlord's. this is an example of a series of unfortunate events that all come together at the wrongest possible time to spiral hopelessly out of control, leaving me to pick up the pieces to the best of my ability.
If I can't get the hold on my student account removed by fall term, I won't be able to attend college, this is not the best of situations for any man to be in, for any reason.
the rent is only 709 dollars or so, so it won't be hard to pay off, but it will be hard to make the money when I have to cover my own needs, it'll also be harder to work as I'll have this serious issue to deal with.
less time for work, less time to make the money to pay the debt I owe, and nowhere to sleep at the moment.
it's a no-win situation for me, a situation I wound up getting in, but a situation beyond my control.
and so I'll have to suck it up, deal with it, and keep moving forward with as much grace as I can muster, my life was looking up until I found out that I couldn't accept summer term financial aid, fortunately, this issue came just as my fiverr gig's customers began flowing in more reliably.
my youtube channel has also been making roughly five dollars a month, which sincerely helps matters considerably.
Let's hope that no further problems stand In my way, I'll be looking for alternative means of working, but the depression that comes with falling into this situation is likely going to be the biggest problem of all...
Monday, June 16, 2014
Sunday, June 15, 2014
Raging Demon of the week
This is a matchup with a low ranking dudley player, RD use strikes once more thanks to a bit of cleverly timed wakeup buffering!
Saturday, June 14, 2014
Friday, June 13, 2014
Thursday, June 12, 2014
Monday, June 9, 2014
Saturday, June 7, 2014
Thursday, June 5, 2014
Wednesday, June 4, 2014
On the subject of evil
It is the divine hope of men that all evil should be banished.
what then can be said of the evil within men? should we suffer its intrusion into our hearts? demand its imminent absence from our selves? or should we simply accept evil, not as a malevolent force within us all, but as a necessity borne from the desire to survive?
Once I heard a quote that claimed "evil was evolution at its finest!" and in many regards, that holds true, for do we not define evil as an existence of base survival at the expense of all the good in the world? is not evil the impulse that commands you to take what is not yours for your own needs and desires? is not wickedness and malevolence a bevy of emotional states that suffer the light of day, that they might shadow potential opportunities to better give you the realization that an opportunity has thus presented itself to you, despite the fact that it costs someone else something?
if evil, as we have defined it, is the dogs attacking one another over a vital morsel of meat to keep themselves alive, then perhaps evil is not some cold machination of the devils within the hearts of men, but our animal selves, demanding that we thrive when the world of light demands our deaths.
perhaps then it can be said, that good men go to their deaths by execution, for do they not submit to the law when they do so? do they often resist in those final moments? no, they accept their fates, holding still much of the time, or so the popular image would have us believe, and so it is entirely reasonable to presume that in those moments, they gave up their evil desire to survive in order to submit and feel the emptiness of good, and emptiness that would not fill their bellies or give them the warm smiles of their loved ones, but instead an emptiness of resignation borne from good, the absence of evil.
what of good then? so ephemeral this device, so hard to ascertain its practical applications in the world.
but good works on another front, one we have proven exists, yet one that, even to this day we refuse to recognize, for to recognize the presence of one's heart would be to acknowledge that we do not need to survive, and as a result, that we are evil.
perhaps then, no matter the scale of evil, the hunger of wickedness that drives us away from extinction has been misrepresented, and that evil and good are a simple, humble balance, evil only being justifiable when it aids us in living, good only justifiable when it is little more than a luxury, afforded when we have filled the void of hunger that evil commands us to fill.
is evil survival at its pinnacle? is good the desire to step aside, that the wicked might prevail in their own survival? or is it simply an absence of good, a primal side of ourselves that we demonized for many, many years, denying the evil until the good became distorted into something we no longer wished for?
I fear that we, as men, have fallen out of balance and misdefined our true states entirely, and that good and evil are simply faces we planted on these states of being in our confusion, and that nothing I have said is true, for it is an illusion, a wrapping, a misrepresentation of the ultimate truth and a pale shadow of what I intended to get across when first my thoughts wove themselves onto this forum.
so perhaps evil is survival at its most extreme, then perhaps good is the collective will to something far greater than survival, a will that transcends the wickedness of need.
what then can be said of the evil within men? should we suffer its intrusion into our hearts? demand its imminent absence from our selves? or should we simply accept evil, not as a malevolent force within us all, but as a necessity borne from the desire to survive?
Once I heard a quote that claimed "evil was evolution at its finest!" and in many regards, that holds true, for do we not define evil as an existence of base survival at the expense of all the good in the world? is not evil the impulse that commands you to take what is not yours for your own needs and desires? is not wickedness and malevolence a bevy of emotional states that suffer the light of day, that they might shadow potential opportunities to better give you the realization that an opportunity has thus presented itself to you, despite the fact that it costs someone else something?
if evil, as we have defined it, is the dogs attacking one another over a vital morsel of meat to keep themselves alive, then perhaps evil is not some cold machination of the devils within the hearts of men, but our animal selves, demanding that we thrive when the world of light demands our deaths.
perhaps then it can be said, that good men go to their deaths by execution, for do they not submit to the law when they do so? do they often resist in those final moments? no, they accept their fates, holding still much of the time, or so the popular image would have us believe, and so it is entirely reasonable to presume that in those moments, they gave up their evil desire to survive in order to submit and feel the emptiness of good, and emptiness that would not fill their bellies or give them the warm smiles of their loved ones, but instead an emptiness of resignation borne from good, the absence of evil.
what of good then? so ephemeral this device, so hard to ascertain its practical applications in the world.
but good works on another front, one we have proven exists, yet one that, even to this day we refuse to recognize, for to recognize the presence of one's heart would be to acknowledge that we do not need to survive, and as a result, that we are evil.
perhaps then, no matter the scale of evil, the hunger of wickedness that drives us away from extinction has been misrepresented, and that evil and good are a simple, humble balance, evil only being justifiable when it aids us in living, good only justifiable when it is little more than a luxury, afforded when we have filled the void of hunger that evil commands us to fill.
is evil survival at its pinnacle? is good the desire to step aside, that the wicked might prevail in their own survival? or is it simply an absence of good, a primal side of ourselves that we demonized for many, many years, denying the evil until the good became distorted into something we no longer wished for?
I fear that we, as men, have fallen out of balance and misdefined our true states entirely, and that good and evil are simply faces we planted on these states of being in our confusion, and that nothing I have said is true, for it is an illusion, a wrapping, a misrepresentation of the ultimate truth and a pale shadow of what I intended to get across when first my thoughts wove themselves onto this forum.
so perhaps evil is survival at its most extreme, then perhaps good is the collective will to something far greater than survival, a will that transcends the wickedness of need.
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